Cade - 2 Months

Today is Cade's 2 month birthday. It's an event worth marking. I normally don't post twice in a day but I had to put this up as well. In losing someone to death it makes it even more important to celebrate life.

Cade has changed leaps and bounds in the last 2 months and it's all been a complete blur. Probably because it's been so hectic and so sleep deprived!

Here's a quick snapshot of him at 2 months:
He's now smiling and cooing at us regularly. It's pretty cute!
The fussiness that was almost unbearable in the first 4-6 weeks has improved remarkably. It seems as if he's learning to process his gas better, we're getting better at finding ways to help relieve his discomfort, we're learning his cries, and he's trusting more. The combo of these makes for a happier baby (which makes for happier parents).
He's starting to make different cries\fusses for different issues. The best example is when he needs a diaper change. Instead of crying uncontrollably, he starts giving a little fuss to let us know he needs a "freshie."
He's already becoming more independent. More and more we're being able to set him in his bouncy seat, in his swing or on another area and let him hang out. No longer is it absolutely necessary to be on a body at all times. Oh, it's also noteworthy that he's sleeping in his bassinet for a portion of every night.
We've also learned how to help him get to sleep more efficiently. While at first he didn't like being swaddled, he does now and it helps him relax for sleep time. White noise being played will also help change a restless sleep into a peaceful\deep one.
Cade was getting pretty bald (which is a new concept Dylan has learned about and likes to apply to his lego toys). The hair that had disappeared is already starting to grow back.
He's growing like mad. I don't have his stats to give right now. His  month check up is at the end of the week so I'll have to post that info then.

Playing With His Big Brother

Enjoying The Sights and Sounds of the Grocery Store

Cade - 2 Months

I'll be honest, the first month with Cade was pretty rough. We've made it through the big shock of the new addition (I think) and have gotten to know each other well enough to really start enjoying each other. Yay!

Gone

As a person that is normally pretty up front with her own feelings I'm in a very hard position right now. I've been dealt very difficult news and I'm not even sure how to start processing it. This morning I found out that I lost a friend. Even worse is that it wasn't some outside force that took her from her family and friends but her own hand. My friend, who I knew as a wonderfully honest and dear person who was quick to laugh and had an enormous capacity to love also struggled with an inner demon - depression. That evil demon became so over powering that it overwrote all the love she had for her husband, two beautiful young daughters and all her family and friends and caused her to see nothing worth living for. I really just can't wrap my head around it.

The news first came to me through my sister in law. Long ago, we had the small world realization that we knew the same girl through different venues. Me through my book club and my sister in law through work. The book club I had with my friend has been officially disbanded for a few years now. However, we met on a monthly basis for 7 years and formed good friendships within it. I'm still in regular touch with several of the girls from that club, my friend being one of them.

Upon hearing such shocking news I didn't believe it so called upon a coworker who was very close to this friend and might know. I called work to talk to her and when she answered the phone crying it confirmed the horrible news. After getting some information from her and sharing our shock and grief together I called another book club gal. I had the unfortunate job of breaking the news to her and saying it aloud...that our friend was gone....hit me hard. I completely lost it and haven't really been able to stop crying since.

I'm going to miss my friend. I absolutely don't understand how I'll never see her again. The last time was a few months ago when she and her girls came over to see our new house. The last scene I have of her in my mind is a smiling girl carrying a beautiful daughter in one hand and holding her oldest daughter's hand in her other. Never did I think it would be the last time I would see her.

Her daughters. Those girls bring tears to my eyes faster than any other thought. My heart absolutely breaks for those girls who won't have their mother. Even worse, they are so young that they will have little to no memory of what a wonderful woman their mother was. More than anything in this world I hope that is something my children will never have to experience.

And her husband. He is a great man. I don't always bond with friends' husbands but I did with him. He is a handy guy and we often talked tools together and he loved to show off his work shop in their cool old barn to me. I remember when my friend met him. Our book club met at a restaurant for our 5th (?) anniversary and she came to the meeting on cloud 9. They had recently had their first date and she knew without a shadow of a doubt that he was the man she would marry. She was absolutely right. They wed a few years later. In fact, their wedding happened in Boston just one day after my brother got married in Dallas. It was a crazy weekend for me, but I made both joyous events.

And she's gone. And she's left her loving husband, two young daughters, family and friends to deal with such unimaginable grief.

From what I understand of her situation, she's not being doing well for about a month. However, she was going through all avenues possible to get herself the help she knew she needed. And it still wasn't enough to overcome the dark cloud.

It's all so hard to understand and even harder to try and accept. I wanted to try and put down my feelings into words here as some therapy for myself to try and wrap my head around what's happened. But I can't. It's just such a horrible event and one I'm sure will affect the rest of my life. It's not natural to lose such a young friend. I'll miss her.

A Little BIt of This and a Little Bit of That

I have to say that I have the utmost respect for stay at home moms. They have the busiest\hardest jobs! Mike and I are both at home with two kids and it's amazing how busy we stay and how little I feel is accomplished at the end of the day. My type A personality feels like a failure quite a bit of the time and I have to constantly step back and remind myself that I just had a baby 8 weeks ago and our family is undergoing a HUGE adjustment.

So, what are our days like? Well, I feel like we have fallen into somewhat of a pattern that, most days, works for us. For Dylan, we have been keeping his pre Cade schedule. He usually wakes between 6:30 and 7, naps 12-2ish and goes to bed between 7:30 and 8. In the morning, Mike gets up with him, takes Cade whenever he wakes around that time and then lets me sleep another hour or two until Cade needs to eat again.

Once I'm up, we all get ready. It's a good thing we have a huge master bath because 4 people are in it for a long time in the morning. It takes a while to get us all showered and dressed while keeping kids happy and out of trouble. That lasts about an hour to an hour and a half.

After we're all ready, we often do something in the morning whether it's errands, a doctor's appointment or a fun activity\playdate. Sometimes it's all of us and sometimes we split up - 1 parent with 1 kid. At nap time, Mike usually naps when Dylan does. If he feels rested (which is maybe 1 day a week), he'll skip a nap and either run errands solo or take some time to work out. During this time, I'll feed Cade, feed myself and either relax with Cade or exert a lot of energy keeping him happy, depending on his mood. Most days the house is fairly quiet at this time which is a nice change of pace.

Happy Cade

In the afternoon, it's working on projects around the house or errands or a fun family activity. Then, I hang with the boys while Mike makes dinner. After dinner, I hang with the boys while Mike cleans up our mess. Shortly thereafter one or both of us put Dylan to bed. After Dylan goes down, one of us might work out or we might work on things around the house or we might just both be so tired we sit down and watch a little tv. Sometime between 9 and 11 (yeah it varies a lot) I take Cade and myself up to bed.

Now throughout the day, Cade is eating, sleeping, needing lots of diaper changes and very often needing some soothing. Anything Mike or I get done throughout the day normally involves holding a baby while doing it. I've been getting lots of use out of our baby carrier. While at home, Dylan plays with his toys, reads books (with us and also by himself), watches tv, runs around outside (with our supervision) and we've even been throwing in the occasional craft project.

A lot of what we do around the house is just trying to keep it from looking like a disaster zone - laundry, picking up, cleaning, etc. However, we are still very much trying to get settled into the house. So we are spending a lot of time trying to get some small projects done. Some of our recent projects have been finishing Cade's room, getting our outdoors ready for spring (furniture out, trimming bushes, fertilizing lawn, etc.), working on decor details in the rooms and talking with contractors about a few things we'll need to hire out for.

We want to be sure to do some special things for Dylan so he gets to enjoy this special family time we have while I'm on leave. Some of our weekly activities we do primarily for him are music class, play dates with friends (usually at parks or at someone else's house), library story and craft time, taking walks (which sometimes also includes some park time) and craft projects at home. Sometimes we do something a little more exotic like a trip to the aquarium, playing in the sprinklers (with the unusual warm weather we've been having) and we even went to watch a house being demolished.

Playing Car Wash

Cade Watched Too

Kicking the Water

We Found an Antler in the Front Flower Bed

The folks we bought our house from are building another home about a mile from us.
First they have to demolish the one currently on the property.
They called and asked if we wanted to come watch. We though it sounded
like a fun show so we go the family up and out of the house early to watch.

Dylan and I Waiting For The Show
Unfortunately the show started over an hour late and Dylan was much
more interested in going to the bagel shop then watching the demo.

So we only got to see about a quarter of the house come down.
That happened in only 5 minutes! Pretty cool.

In addition to kid centric things, we've also been busy with cat centric things. Poor Oliver hasn't been feeling well and we've been spending a good amount of time at the vet, on the phone with the vet and trying to get blood draws on him at home to figure out what is ailing him. His official diagnosis was made as pancreatitis. At this point we are treating the symptoms and hoping it resolves and doesn't get more serious. Poor little guy!

Basically, we stay on the go constantly, clean constantly, get nothing done and still (mostly) have a messy house. I'm not sure how that happens but it does. Having a non sleeping infant sure does make life an insane juggling act. I'm counting down to week 12 when I hope I get to start sleeping for longer than 2 hour stretches!

First Family Downtown Adventure

A couple of weeks ago, my good friend Eddy came in town and I blogged about the time he spent hanging out at our house and building a snowman. A couple of days later we wanted to go downtown to spend a little more time with him before he left our fair city. We arranged to meet for dinner. In order to make a the trip a little more beefed up since it would take a lot of effort to get everyone there, we decided to go as a family to the aquarium before our dinner date.

I wanted to share a few pictures from our trip. In the spirit of not having tons of blogging time, here is our trip in picture captions.

While nursing Cade in the car, we got a great bird show. A seagull pulled a plastic bag out of the trash. From this bag, a half filled coke bottle fell out. Then the bird dragged the bag across the street (stopping cars) and proceeded to eat a sandwich out of it and fought of several other birds from its catch. It was quite the feat\show.

Sting Ray\Shark Touch Tank

BIG Fish!

Myrtle the Turtle

Our last trip there was on a weekend and was a mad house. It was much nicer to go during the week when it wasn't packed full. Also, I was glad we got to go as the aquarium is about to undergo some major projects that will have some of our favorite things off exhibit for many months to come. Dylan had a great time and Cade slept through it all. So, it went fairly smoothly.

Afterwards we met Eddy for dinner and had a good time. Cade was awake but mostly happy. Dylan was getting a little tired and wiggly but Eddy helped keep him pretty well occupied throughout our dinner. It was our first dinner out with both boys at a sit down restaurant. It was a bit chaotic but we made it through unscathed. Adjusting to life with two kids is definitely a daily adventure. The dynamic of every family activity is SO different!

All By Myself

The last couple of weeks have been very busy for us. We've sort of settled into a pattern\routine....at least as much as you can do with an infant. Because of that, we've been getting out of the house more, being more productive at the house and, in general, feeling like real people again (aka out of sweatpants purgatory). This keeping busy thing has also kept me from blogging about it all. I hope to get a few posts up this week about what we've been up to the last couple.

In the meantime, I wanted to put a quick post up about today. Now, I'm a pretty "spoiled" Mom in regards to how our parental situation compares to many others. By that, I mean that I know I'm ridiculously lucky to be home on maternity leave with my husband also at home with me. Two full time parents for two very busy kids. By no means do I ever think I have it bad. I know we've got it good. Having said that, being a parent is never an easy job.

Well, soccer season is quickly approaching which means Mike will be gone for the good part of every Sunday. Today, the team actually got together for their first practice which meant I was solo with the kids for the first time. Okay, not really for the first time. I've had Cade solo quite a lot both at home and for different outings - trips to the airport, errands, play dates and many doctor's appointments. I've also been the solo care taker for both Dylan and Cade while Mike has been busy doing things around the house or out at appointments. Those times that I had both of the boys to look after alone were not more than a couple of hours. So, I was a little nervous for today when I would have both of them all by myself for a good chunk of the day.

This morning, I put my big girl pants on and faced the situation bravely by planning an outing with Dylan and Cade. After getting everyone dressed and ready, then undressed for diaper changes, dressed again,  then jacketed and shoes on, in the baby Bjorn and into the stroller, we set off on a 1.25 mile trek to the nearby bagel place. Dylan was happy in the stroller, Cade was happy looking around until he fell asleep a 1/2 mile into the trip and I was happy to be out in the nice weather getting a good workout by pushing a toddler and carrying a baby.

They did great at breakfast. Dylan, who's decided after a year of barely eating a morsel to start eating a lot, ate a whole bagel (as did I) and Cade slept soundly. Then we walked home. It was a very drama free trip. We did have a little unexpected mileage added to the trip to double back and find Dylan's Yaya (lovey) when we realized it had gotten dropped along the way but it was found so no harm done.

Mmmmm.....His Last Bite of the Bagel

Since Cade was still asleep when we got home, the weather was lovely and I needed to cool off from my little workout, we stayed outside and played in the yard. Dylan's new favorite game is dueling like they do in Harry Potter. This basically involves two people, two sticks and pointing them at each other while saying spells from Harry Potter. After we dueled all over the yard, we headed back in so Cade could have some brunch. Dylan decided he wanted to try on the Bjorn. He had the best time running around the house in it (and was super cute doing that I might add). We chased each other back and forth for a while. I felt like I got a 2nd workout from that fun.

He wanted to carry Cade but I convinced
him a stuffed animal would be better.

He also needed to try on my flip flops and sunglasses!

Pretty soon it was nap time. Dylan went down at his usual time and, after eating yet again, Cade fell asleep again as well. The house was quiet when Mike got home from his soccer practice. In fact, both of the boys slept just over 3 hours....an hour longer than either of them ever sleeps during the day. Amazing! The morning couldn't have gone any better.

With the weather still wonderful once they woke up and still several hours of daylight left (thanks to springing forward), we spent more time outside. Mike needed to fertilize the yard so I pulled a trick out of my fun hat and made a car wash for Dylan. Cade watched us dip the cars into the shaving cream and rinse them off in the water. Dylan loved it and kept playing even after we had to move it inside on towels to escape the dusk mosquitoes.







All of this fun was followed by a lovely dinner that Mike whipped up on the grill. I think this house is going to be a lot of fun in the Spring\Summer weather and I'm looking forward to spending more days like this with my boys.

Now I've got to run. There's a screaming baby looking for some dinner!

Finally...Snow!!!

Those are not words that would usually come out of anyones mouth in this part of the world at the beginning of March. But, here's the thing, this winter has been weird. After our surprise early snowstorm in October, we've only had 2 other small snowfalls. Not only that but our temperatures have been very mild with many days in the 50s. Normally we start stripping down to our t shirts when it hits 40 degrees in the winter because it feels so warm with the freezing temperatures we are usually enduring.

Since our first snowstorm of the year, Dylan's been dying to see some more. He just loves playing in it. So, when we finally got a few inches at the end of last week followed by cool enough days to keep it on the ground for a while, Mike made sure to let Dylan take advantage of it. It's been too cold for Cade to go out so I've watched the boys have snowball fights, make snow angels and, most importantly, make snowmen.

Last Wednesday while the snow was still falling, the boys gathered up what little was sticking and made a little snow family. Then, they were kind enough to transfer them up to the back deck where I could see them too.

Our Snowman Family
(My head didn't make the transition smoothly.)

Now, I've mentioned all the illness we've been having in our house on one of my previous posts. The Saturday before last, Mike's cousin Erik and his family came over to meet Cade. We love hanging out with Erik and Jessie and Dylan loves hanging out with their kids Justin and Ryan. After waking up from his nap that day, Dylan was not himself. Motherly instinct was telling me he was sick and we should cancel but I didn't listen to it. After our guests had been at the house for only a short while and Dylan wasn't interested in getting off the couch to play, he started vomiting. Jessie took Cade while Mike and I dealt with the mess. Once we got everything under control, they took off to hopefully spare their kids getting the bug. Well, this last Saturday, we had our rain date. This time, the boys had a great time playing and the adults a great time catching up.

Dylan and Justin Watching a Movie

Yesterday we had another visitor. Just a couple of days ago I got a call from one of my good friends from the college days, Eddy, who let me know he was coming in town for work for a couple of days. Cade and I picked him up at the airport yesterday and he came out and spent the afternoon with us at the house. Since the weather was up in the upper 30s (reasonable) and there was still snow to take advantage of outside, we did just that. Mike, Eddy and Dylan worked on building a snowman and Cade and I walked around the yard playing photographer (Cade was not happy staying still).

Rolling the Snow
(The bare patches are where they'd already collected the snow.)

Stacking it Up

Hugging the Snowman
We got to use our snowman making kit for the first time.
The only thing it didn't include was twigs for arms.

The Boys with Their Tall Snowman

And Now With Arms
(Though hard to see)

It was a really fun and, for us, busy weekend. Cade celebrated by not sleeping last night while Dylan took an hour longer than normal nap today to catch up. After too much fun and no sleep I'm exhausted today. Maybe tonight we'll get some sleep and be up for some fun in town with Eddy tomorrow afternoon before he heads home.

Good Guys and Bad Guys

Well, it looks like we may have turned a corner. Hopefully I'm not jinxing us, but the family has all been healthy for several days now. Well enough to have had some company this weekend. I've got a few pictures to download and post on those visits so I'll tell more about them later. For now, I wanted to note a few cute things that Dylan's been doing lately so they'll be documented for posterities sake.

"Find Me!"
We hear this a lot. He hasn't yet figured out
that the game works better when you change
your hiding spot every once in a while.
He usually picks one and stays with it for a while.

Dylan's learned his hair and eye color as well as those of the rest of his immediate family and he likes to recite them often. "My hair's brown my eyes blue!" If I've been separated from the boys for a while - like if I'm upstairs napping for a bit or Mike and Dylan's do some errands on their own - Dylan will come up to me, give me a big hug and say "I'm so happy to see you!" Ahhhh...makes a Momma's heart melt. "What's happening (to)" is a phrase we also hear a lot when he's watching something on tv (familiar to him or not) and when he's playing with his toys. The boy likes to narrate his surroundings. (In fact, just after I typed this paragraph, Dylan dipped one of his toys, named Twitch, over the edge of the small sink in the island and said "What happened to Twitch?" Funny boy.)

Several times, Dylan's commented on something random and said "It's beautiful!" (sounds more like boo-ta-ful). We were in a furniture store last week and I told Dylan to let me know if he saw anything he liked and he ran up to a staged area, pointed to a hurricane lamp with rocks in it and said "I like these rocks. They're beautiful."

Dylan Giving Cade a Kiss

These next few cute sayings aren't so new but cute enough that they need to be noted. Dylan likes to get under the covers of our bed and say "I'm comfy and cozy." Very often, he also likes Mike and I to join him under the covers (or on the couch) and say "Snuggle with me." Who can resist that request? Another thing he does is no matter boy, girl or animal, he refers to everyone as "that guy." Last night when one of our weekend visitors was getting ready to leave, Dylan asked us "Where that guy going?"

Dylan and Cade Hanging Out

Dylan's also been developing his pretend play. He'll get two of his toys and have them interact with each other. Just yesterday, he had Spiderman and Guido (from the Cars movies) interacting by hiding in the "cave" together (which was made by my leg and a pillow) and then they had a conversation and started fighting on the rung of the ladder that was out to replace a lightbulb in the living room. I love trying to eavesdrop on what he's saying but he normally catches me doing that and will stop talking and smile at me shyly. I need to work on my ninja skills so I can sneak up on him better.

But, his newest saying is the one we hear most often. He must label every tv character, toy and person we encounter as a Good Guy or a Bad Guy. It's pretty humorous in some situations. It's also pretty tricky in others. While I get that kiddos (and some adults) see the world in black and white, some things are a little more gray. It makes our job helping him label things a bit of an exercise of the mind at times. Given the amount of quality sleep we're getting these days even a simple exercise of the mind is a lot of work!