Anyone Seen My Motivation?

It seems to be missing. Perhaps it got buried under the snow?

After acheiving my Disney weight and going on vacation, the scales did what they normally do after a vacation, go up. So, I spent a week getting it back down, ate with slightly (and I mean very slightly) more freedom over a weekend and then spent this week working all week to get that off again. Why won't those 2 pounds just STAY AWAY?!?

Reading the above, it would seem like my motivation and dedication would be in place. That's not exactly the case. I have been waging a huge mental war against myself this week that has caused several big battles on a daily basis. I'm at a tough place in the weight loss process.  I know what I need to do to get where I want to go (pre-baby weight), I have a very solid goal in mind (to wear a specific dress to my good friend's wedding in April) but to get these last pounds off requires far more dedication than I seem to have in me right now.

Kicking my butt all week long with diet and exercise is usually the easy part for me. I'm scheduled. I'm routined. I normally can do it without complaint. Something was very different this week.

For one, I woke up hungry every day and the hunger monster within reared it's ugly head around every corner. I did my best to bonk him on the head to get him under control but he was relentless. It took every ounce of resistence in me to only eat the amount that I know I could eat to acheive the weight loss I wanted to. It was SO HARD and I felt SO HUNGRY for much of the week. That sucked.

In order to burn more calories to offset the extra little snack I was having daily to keep myself sane, I added another 30 minutes of workout time almost every day this week. That means I was getting in an hour and a half a day. Because of other obligations this week, that meant I had to fit that 30 minutes in before work on Thursday and Friday. I actually set my alarm 2 days in a row! Usually, I wait for Dylan's very dependable internal alarm clock to get me out of bed. But I dragged my butt out of bed while Mike, Dylan and the kitties were still snoozing, got dressed in my gym clothes and went to the cold, dark, depressing basement to fit in my time. If you know me, you know that I am absolutely not a morning person. It was so incredibly hard, with no motivation at my side, to make myself do that. But I did. Normally, that would make me proud beyond belief but it's not this week for some reason.

I seem to have lost my motivation. I can only battle my inner determination for so long before I throw up my hands and surrender. In weight loss, every day is a new day and every decision counts. I hope that next week the healthy decisions are a little easier to go along with because my reserves are completely wiped out!

So for those of you that think this is easy for me, it's not. It's really not.